Greetings from Florida! For those of you who don’t know me, I was a Lower Elementary guide and then the Director of Admissions at Greenspring before moving to Florida. I have begun this series on Montessori in the Home to help parents find creative ways to implement Montessori practices into day-to-day activities at home. My daughter, Lila, is now three and a half and loves to work in the kitchen!
Getting Involved
Lila has been an active participant in the kitchen since she was very small. Early activities included stirring batter, washing and scrubbing fruits and vegetables, peeling clementines and bananas, pouring coffee beans into the grinder, and dipping bread into eggs for french toast.
These activities help build the essential skills of coordination, concentration, order, and independence. The work also exposes the child to tasting new foods. Lila was always more interested in eating something that she helped to prepare.
As her fine motor coordination increased, Lila started shucking corn, rolling dough, peeling and slicing eggs and bananas with special tools, and peeling carrots and cucumbers with a peeler and wavy chopper. Now Lila is also slicing vegetables with an acrylic knife, grating cheese, and juicing oranges. Child-size gardening gloves allow Lila to stir soup and flip pancakes without fear of touching the hot pan.
Involving a toddler at dinner time when everyone is tired can be challenging. If I have a few extra minutes earlier in the day, I will prepare part of the meal while Lila is still at school. This will allow me to focus more energy on her participation during the meal preparation. Sometimes I plan our joint projects for the weekends when I have more energy.
There are other ways besides cooking that children can help. Setting the table, sweeping up crumbs, and placing dirty dishes in the dishwasher are other ways that little ones can contribute. Montessorians know that children’s self-esteem comes from making meaningful contributions, rather than receiving compliments. So allowing children to be active participants in the family is a tremendous gift!
Learning Tower
The single most important tool you will need to allow your child to participate in the kitchen is a safe stool. We put the “Learning Tower” on our baby gift registry before Lila was born. Three and a half years later, we are still using it every day. When Lila was very small, we wrapped the sides with saran wrap so she couldn’t fall out. Soon she was able to climb in and out independently. The adjustable height allows the stool to grow with her. And you don’t need to worry about her falling off a regular stool.
I have seen some great “hacks” on the internet for converting an Ikea stool into a learning tower, for a much lower cost. If you’re handy, this is definitely worth a try!
Eating Independently
As much as your child will enjoy helping prepare food, she will also be highly motivated to eat independently. When Lila was very small, she sat in a Bumbo or high chair. As soon as she was able to sit in a chair without falling off, we moved her to a toddler-size table and chair. (The table was bought from Ikea with the legs chopped to make it shorter.)
While she still sat in a high chair for family dinner at the dining table, all other meals and snacks were eaten at her special table. Soon, Lila began rejecting the high chair. That’s when we switched to a booster seat in a regular dining chair.
Montessori Services makes child-size glass dishes that are very sturdy. While I don’t like to replicate too many Montessori lessons in the home (as I like them to remain special at school and be presented by the experts!), I did invest in two small glass pitchers so that Lila could practice pouring. I have a full list of recommended supplies below.
In order to further increase independence, you can make child-size dishes, utensils, kitchen tools, and cleaning supplies available at the child’s level. This can be a special shelf or just a lower kitchen cabinet that you dedicate for your child’s kitchen items.
You might consider creating a water and snack station on a low shelf or table. By having water and healthy snacks available at all times, your child can help herself to food when she is hungry. You can also dedicate a low shelf of the refrigerator for your child’s use and keep liquids in smaller containers that are easy to pour.
Don’t feel like you need to tackle all of this at once. Try picking just one new system to implement in your home and see how it works!
I have also written about setting up a Montessori bedroom and a Montessori bathroom. Next I will tackle the play area! Questions, comments, suggestions? Email me at mjarrell@greenspringmontessori.org.
Resources:
There are many wonderful tools to help young children work safely in the kitchen.
Some of my favorite resources include:
Montessori Services (child-size tools)
How We Montessori (blog)
Some of my favorite products include:
- Learning tower or sturdy stool
- Child-size apron
- Wavy chopper
- Banana slicer
- Apple slicer
- Egg and mushroom slicer
- Citrus juicer/grater
- Nylon knife
- Peeler
- Non-skid cutting board
- Non-skid mixing bowl
- Spatula, mixing spoon, scrapers, whisk
- Child-size rolling pin
- Child-size oven mitts
- Child-size pitcher, glasses, plates, and utensils
- Spreaders
- Dishwashing station
- Non-toxic cleaning supplies
We all know that young children thrive on consistency and routine. Dr. Montessori discovered that children from ages one to four are actually in a “sensitive period” for order. This means that not only do they crave consistency from their environment and schedule, but that toddlers are particularly attuned to developing an internal sense of order at this age, if given opportunities to develop this skill.
For this reason, Montessori environments – both at school and in the home – are carefully prepared so that every item has a place. (I have previously posted about setting up Montessori spaces in the home – the bedroom and the bathroom – and am currently working on a piece about the kitchen.) But while it’s fairly easy to create physical places for things, creating a sense of order throughout the day is far more difficult. Young children have a strong need to feel in control and yet so much of what happens during the day is determined by others. Plus, toddlers can’t yet grasp the concept of time – today, tomorrow and yesterday – because the part of the brain that is able to plan ahead and make predictions about the future is still developing.
Creating a few simple routines at home can help your toddler practice making simple predictions, as well as understand concepts such as “before and after.” A consistent routine can (sometimes) eliminate power struggles because your child feels more control over what is happening. A routine is especially helpful during difficult times of day, such as at bedtime or when getting ready for school in the morning.
I’ve collected a few tips good from the experts:
Include preparation for transitions in the routine. For example, say, “We have 10 minutes left before we start getting ready for bed. Since toddlers can’t read a clock, try setting a timer. When the timer goes off, it’s time to start the bedtime routine.
Include opportunities for (limited) choice. Toddlers like to feel in control. You can create the illusion of choice, such as “Are you going to wear the blue shirt or the red shirt?” By putting clothes where your child can access them, this also allows for greater control (aka, independence!) over the process.
Get silly! Even with consistent routines, toddlers will still test the limits. Recently, my daughter, Lila, started to resist getting dressed in the morning. Now my husband helps her “hop” into her clothes and then challenges her to see how high she can jump on the trampoline in her “jumping pants.” Hey, whatever works! And when this stops working, we’ll have to change it up again.
Try creating a picture schedule for your child. During her transition to a Montessori toddler program, Lila began to ask every morning, “Is there school today?” So we created a photo schedule that would show what was going to happen each day of the week. It allows us to discuss the next day’s schedule and Lila can refer to the schedule when she wants to know what is going to happen next. I have found several websites that offer free printables for daily routines, such as these on pricelessparenting.com. Older children may enjoy drawing pictures for their charts.
Practice routines with activities that are fun, as well as chores. Routines aren’t only for things kids have to do. Lila enjoys making coffee with her daddy on Saturday mornings. She loves being the taskmaster: “Step 1: Grind the beans!”
Keep your daily schedule as predictable as possible. Your child will take comfort in knowing that she goes to school in the morning, comes home for lunch and a nap, and then has playtime in the afternoon. For this reason, we chose to enroll Lila in a Montessori toddler program five mornings a week. Her adjustment to school still included separation anxiety, but thanks to the consistent schedule, Lila quickly began to learn what to expect each day, and this knowledge provided some comfort. In a matter of a few weeks, Lila began to see school as a joyful place where she belonged; now she walks through that classroom door without looking back!
Stay flexible. Of course, children do need to learn how be flexible and deal with minor changes. But that’s why we offer children a predictable routine as a foundation–so they can rise to the occasion to handle big changes when they need to. If there is an interruption to the routine, you can tell your child, “I know we usually do ___, but today we are going to do ___ because (reason). Tomorrow we will go back to our usual schedule.”
It is never too late to start a routine. You can introduce a new routine by saying, “The way that we have been doing things has not been working. We are going to try something new. Here is our new schedule.” Give the new routine some time before making adjustments. Your toddler will resist at first; consistency is key!
To read more about the benefits of setting up routines for your toddler, check out this article by Aha! Parenting.
If you would like to learn more about our Toddler program, please click here.
Does this sound familiar?
“How was your day?” … “Fine.”
“What did you do at school?” … “Nothing.”
It can be hard to get children to open up about what’s going on in their world, especially after a long day at school. Here are a few different communication strategies you can try. Find ones that work best for your family and then practice until they become part of your daily routine. This process takes time but can lead to more satisfying conversations in the long run.
Strategies to Try:
Wait at least a half an hour
After a long day at school wait at least 30 minutes to trying to engage in a conversation. Give your child a chance to take off the backpack, relax, and have a snack.
Ask open-ended questions
“Do you have homework?” or “Did you give your speech?” are questions that only invite a yes or no response. So try to pose open ended questions. Get creative! (There is a list of examples below.)
Be present
The moment your child starts to engage in conversation, stop what you are doing, and give your full attention. It can be hard to tear yourself away from what you’re doing to focus on a child’s question or comment, but your response can either encourage or shut down the conversation. Don’t forget to look interested!
Listen! And stretch the conversation…
Don’t talk, listen! Try comments like “Really?” “Uh-huh?” “I don’t believe it!” “Wow!” to stretch the conversation. They are non-threatening and invite the child to open up. You can also reflect back what the child is saying so they know you understand, and then be quiet so they can talk more. Child: “I played on the swing.” You: “You played on the swing.” The trick is to repeat the tidbit in a matter-of-fact but interested way to get your child to open up and add more.
Try to listen without judgement
Pushing, prodding, demanding, coaxing, lecturing, and threatening are sure ways to end conversations. Questions that begin with “Why” often make kids defensive. “Why did you wear that?” won’t work nearly as well as, “What do you think most of the kids will be wearing to the theater?”
Resist the urge to jump in with solutions and advice
Your child needs a chance to vent and can’t hear advice until she does. Then she needs a chance to figure out her own solutions, which is how she develops confidence and competence. When we can reflect feelings and then help children brainstorm solutions, kids find us more useful to talk to — and they’re more likely to seek us out when they have problems.
Take advantage of indirect communication
Kids often open more in the car, on a walk, or in the dark — all times when eye contact is limited. Remember that these are great times to get kids talking. Another opportunity for indirect communication is when their friends are over or in your car. Just keep quiet and listen. Your child knows you’re there, of course, but often is more willing to talk than if you were speaking directly.
Questions a child might answer at the end of a long school day:
What made you laugh today?
Did anything silly happen?
Did anyone do anything super nice for you?
What is the nicest thing you did for someone else?
Was there an example of unkindness? How did you respond?
What games did you play at recess?
Does everyone have a friend at recess?
Who did you sit with at lunch?
Who do you want to make friends with but haven’t yet? Why not?
Did you help anyone today?
Did you tell anyone “thank you?”
Who inspired you today?
What is something that surprised you?
What is something that challenged you?
What made you feel proud?
How were you brave today?
Will you teach me a song you learned at school?
What was your least favorite part of the day?
Tell me something good (or three!) that happened today.
What are you looking forward to tomorrow?
Do you have a teenager? Huffington Post has some great ideas about starting the conversation with your teenage children. Take a look here – https://www.huffingtonpost.com/liz-evans/28-ways-to-ask-your-teens-how-was-school-today-without-asking-them-how-was-school-today_b_5751546.html
If you are interested in learning more about Greenspring Montessori School, please click here to request more information.
Though the ample spring rains have been trying at times, the project found a much more productive rhythm in May. After spending April in a battle of wills with the vein of Cockeysville Marble running through the site, rock breaking yielded to a considerable amount of grading and foundation preparation. The new addition’s configuration has taken form as footings have been poured—their purpose is to support the foundation and prevent settling, and the site has been cleared of all remaining intrusive elements—electrical and internet cables and less difficult sections of rock.
On the interior, load bearing walls have been demolished and structural steel beams and columns await installation, the existing slab has been cut in various places for plumbing rough-ins, new plywood sheathing has been installed, and window and door openings cut throughout. With a little imagination – ok, maybe a lot – you can see the new classroom building taking shape. June’s efforts will bring far greater clarity to the image.
Written by Margaret Jarrell, former Greenspring Elementary Guide
“The child is capable of developing and giving us tangible proof of the possibility of a better humanity. He has shown us the true process of construction of the human being. We have seen children totally change as they acquire a love for things and as their sense of order, discipline, and self-control develops within them…. The child is both a hope and a promise for mankind.” – Dr. Maria Montessori
Peace education is a major component of the Montessori classroom. Maria Montessori saw the education of young children as the human race’s opportunity to recreate itself in a way that would eliminate war. As with most things, Dr. Montessori did not think that meant children needed to be lectured on the subject, but rather that they needed to be given an opportunity to discover peace for themselves. Adults model peaceful and respectful behavior, and because Montessori classrooms are composed of mixed age groups, older students serve as role models for younger children.
We start building conflict resolution skills with our youngest students. Most classrooms have a peace corner or peace table, at which two students can go to resolve a conflict or a single child can go to calm down and feel peaceful. One strategy is the use of a peace rose. Children learn to take turns holding the peace rose while speaking about how they feel. They stay at the peace table until they have heard each other and resolved their conflict. With very young children, adults model and coach the children with words they can use. Older students can do this independently.
At the Elementary level, “community time” is set aside to help establish a sense of responsibility and place within the group. Students encourage and acknowledge one another. They also help establish rules of conduct for the classroom and the playground. These meetings are student-led and a forum in which conflicts are discussed, brainstormed, and resolved as a group. Role-playing and discussion can be helpful in finding ways to handle challenging situations.
Once students enter our Adolescent Community, they begin exploring questions like, “Are all humans created equal?” and “What brings humans together into groups?” These questions are taken very seriously and are never assumed to have simple answers. We help adolescents seek insight by looking at world history, at the differing cultures of the world’s people, and at the interactions between humanity and the environment. Perhaps most importantly, we think about how future history might be written in a way more in keeping with the harmony that seems possible between people and the world, or between one group of people and the next.
Peace is also, essentially, a habit that Montessori students learn. Lessons in Grace and Courtesy teach our students the habit of viewing and treating others with respect, and then to continue to try to forge understandings where they encounter conflict. Young students practice simple lessons such as how to greet others, say please and thank you, tuck in chairs. Elementary students may practice introducing themselves or the etiquette for making a telephone call. And Adolescents may send thank you letters to experts who have helped them along the way. These lessons are present in Montessori classrooms from such an early age that the habits they create become as natural to our students as using a spoon, or putting on shoes.
At the core of these lessons is respect for others, self, and the environment. Montessori students engage in community service at every level – within the classroom for youngest students and outside the classroom and the school for older students. We encourage our students to be involved by asking, “How can we help others?” This can begin with caring for the environment, such as weeding and sweeping public areas. It can also take the form of volunteering to help others in our school. For example, Lower Elementary students may participate in a campus-wide recycling project. Upper Elementary students may tend community gardens and Adolescents are serving others lunch as a part of the micro-economy. It also involves thinking about the needs of others. Our students often remind each other, “We must be quieter. The toddlers are sleeping next door!”
The benefits of peace education are not just altruistic, but eminently practical. Most adults who have navigated the many changes to the world (or even just the job market) in the last several years have had reason to think about how much more connected everything seems to be getting – countries thousands of miles away can be regular business partners in ways that they might not have a decade or two ago, and people are truly mobile on a global scale for the first time in our planet’s history. Prejudice in favor of one’s own tribe – whether that tribe is formed by religion or geography or your school’s alumni association – has become more and more counterproductive to operating in a world where diversity cannot be avoided and is to be celebrated.
Peace is an amazing concept, a useful tool, and, through Montessori education, an attainable goal. Children are born with innate instincts toward compassion and the practice of compassion becomes ingrained when cultivated over time. Montessori students develop into involved citizens!
“Within the child lies the fate of the future.” -Dr. Maria Montessori
